The author has spent a lifetime in physical pain, at times intense and seemingly unrelievable, balanced by her unconquerable spirit and will to survive. Her story began at birth when she was delivered at her mother’s rural homeplace by a local doctor. It was a breech birth, and the infant was “pulled and tugged.” Throughout her childhood, Rentz complained of hip and leg pain. Yet she developed a passion for gardening that has many times helped her maintain inner peace. Another gift she is blessed with is her ability to sing, bolstered by her abiding Christian faith. For many years she was diagnosed with and treated for fibromyalgia. But in 2007, when her husband was contemplating retirement, and they had just bought their dream home in Rentz’s childhood region of Tennessee, Rentz began to experience pain in her back and groin area so severe that, for much of the time as she so vividly and harrowingly describes, she was screaming, in tears, and barely clinging to life.

This torturing pain evoked a massive search for anyone who could treat her ailment, which was finally identified as pudendal neuralgia. Sometimes she would locate a specialist, only to be told it might be years before she could secure an appointment. Yet by small miracles—”signs from God,” as Rentz characterizes them—someone would hear her plea and schedule an immediate appointment. At times the doctors she contacted could offer little or no help. Most medicines had not the slightest effect on her pain, which she descriptively portrays as comparable to enduring the final stages of childbirth without anesthesia. The condition could lead to death from complications, a thought that constantly shadowed her. Those specialists who did help, though, were not only effective but empathic, and the relief to Rentz, her husband, and family, even when only temporary, was greatly appreciated.

Rentz, a highly organized writer, has composed this frank chronicle with the intention of reaching out to others who may be experiencing her condition or any other that may at times seem hopeless. She candidly depicts her constant efforts when, with children and grandchildren, or singing in church, she must mask her pain with a serene appearance, using extreme mental discipline in the process. Her gardening efforts have created a quiet, natural environment where she can relax, take dips in a warm pool, and see the delights of changing seasons. Too, her mental acumen shines forth in the narrative and has been a factor in the medical processes. For example, in one instance, she composed a lengthy and highly persuasive letter to her insurance company that convinced its director to cover all the extremely high medical expenses related to her little-known condition. The author’s thoughtfulness comes through, as well, as she has sought out others who suffer from her rare condition and might need advice or comfort. Rentz’s vivid recollections of what she went through, such as the many times when she arrived at a doctor’s office unable to stand or speak due to her overwhelming agony, will convince readers of the sincerity of her wish to convey hope. Her personal persistence and determination stand as a model for anyone facing a comparable challenge.